Blergh!

This sucks! Anna has a cold and I have a cold and we both feel wretched and miserable and, on my part anyway, fairly damn angry. Because this is just dumb! (Because I don't 'do' sick well, and never have). Neither of us are getting much sleep, and I love my sleep; Anna because she can't breath (poor lovey) and me because then she wakes up and won't/can't go back to sleep and screams and yells every time she is horizontal, and meanwhile I am just about dropping where I stand, and this is happening every three hours. It's ridiculous. Where is the 'off' button on these things? Why are my instruction books so damn useless? Just what was wrong with my life anyway when it was hollow and meaningless and childless but had a good 8 hours every night? Why did I give up the kind of life where I had the luxury of ringing in sick and spending A WHOLE DAY in bed? Why didn't I do this more often, in preparation for now when I am not going to be able to do it for the next 15 years or so? Why didn't someone remind me? What sort of stupid universal rule is it that if you don't get enough sleep at night, you still have to carry on as normal during the day? How is a person supposed to carry on, with a smile, when she has snot wiped all over her, has Farex sneezed right in her face at high velocity, is thrown up all over, has tits that suddenly start leaking again, and has smoothed over two hissy fits, all before 9am? Where's the bloody angel to come and smooth over my hissy fits? Why did I ever, ever, think that I could do this parenting thing on my own? Why can't I make my child feel better? Where are the know-it-all health professionals when she is crying and snuffling at 3am? Why don't I make a recording of it and play it back to them at full volume when they tell me she's not heavy enough/doesn't nap long enough/should be eating more solids? Why can scientists and doctors and other clever people sort you out with cures for polio and hepatitis and even stick on a new leg if you lose your original one but can't figure out how to cure a cold? These people call themselves intelligent - how hard can it be anyway? How much time do they need to figure it out? Why doesn't bloody God, who I don't believe in anyway but if he really wanted me to believe he could make himself bloody useful, why doesn't he send someone around to make Anna feel better and to let me have some bloody sleep????????